Office workers. What's your best office story? Used to work with a fairly large woman. Every winter,

she would catch a cold and hack and cough and just have a rough go of it. She would have these

horrible coughing fits to the point where we thought she might pass out. One day, she had a horrible

coughing fit and peed herself. That night, the carpet cleaners came in, pushed all of the office chairs

into a back room, and shampooed the rugs. Everyone came in the next day to find their chairs in a

room, and no one knew which chair was which. Everyone spent the day standing or sniffing their

chair to see if they had the pea chair. The big lady was actually pretty dang nice, and she went on

to lose a bunch of weight,

ditch her, lose her husband, and have a great life. So there's a happy ending there.

Came into work, I was the early manager, and before I get to my desk, my phone is ringing.

Answer it, and it's an employee. All he says is, I have to go. I'm bleeding from my butt. Stunned, I say, uh, yeah, you should leave. I walk to his

cube and find a blood-soaked chair with bloody napkins all over it. I ask if he wants to call

911 or something, and he says, no, I'm driving myself. I call maintenance, and I have to explain

to them and upper management how all this blood appeared.

Guy ended up okay and came back to work a couple of days later. Never asked what the heck the issue was.

That's a bleeding haemeroid. Not that you really probably wanted to know. The chair was soaked. It was a lot of

blood. I asked if everything was good after the fact, and he said it was, and nothing to worry about

for other people. I speak from experience. Not quite that bad, but it lasted for days and bled clear

through my pants and left a large stain on my seat at its worst. Went to the ER. The doctor acted

like I was a big wimp and wasting his time. He then forces a golf bowl-sized blood clot out of my butt,

so pretty much not a big deal and nothing a person would ever want to discuss with another

living soul. I work in a public library, which combines all the joy of customer service and

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