There is no one has to work today, man. Look at those traffic times. If you're going anywhere, go now.

Do that many people really have Columbus Day off? I'm trying to be. I've breezed in here. It took me like 35, 40 minutes to get here from Duxbury. You've got a good day. It's 40 minutes from Duxbury? I think, yeah. I think that it's far. Route 3 sucks. Oh my God.

Like, when was the last time you guys had Columbus Day off?

I don't think I ever had Columbus Day off. I think the last time I had it off legitimately was high school. I always forget it's Columbus Day. I don't even know if they gave it to us in college. No. No, no, no. We didn't get it off in college. That many people have Columbus Day off? Are banks, like banks closed? Yes, banks are closed? Stocks and banks and those sorts of things. I don't think the stock market's open. Yeah, stock market's open today. Yeah, I think it's open today. Oh, boy, now we've got to check it out. Mm-hmm. Because all the government stuff is closed. There were zero people on the low.

If you're in sales, why would you go to work today?

I mean, this is the kind of thing.

What are you going to get done?

So it all feeds upon itself.

I guess so.

I know nobody who has today off.

No, I know people who got today off, baby.

I'm glad everybody's observing the holiday.

Right.

By watching the worst Sopranos episode of all time. I was about to say that. The Columbus Day Sopranos episode, the worst Sopranos of all time. And there were a couple bad ones, but that one's the worst. All right. Bad seasons. So, yeah, I mean, there was one season where they just chased a gay guy. Do you remember that when they found out that one guy was gay and they, what was it?

I forget Vito, I think that was him.

And they just chased him around like New Hampshire and he fell in love with a fireman.

And they went over an entire season. Like, what's going on there? Had a way that Meadow's boyfriend who saw him being gay could have been, they could have made a story where he was being threatened and stuff like that and they completely dumped that old storyline all right so this was crazy yesterday there's no doubt in anyone's mind that uh... vice president Mike Pence staged a PR stunt that completely admitted it, right? That he staged it? No, no, no, no, no. Well, Trump told him to do it.

No, hang on, hang on.

I don't know who's behind the whole thing. Let's go through the timeline here because there's the whole Trump told him to do it. And then there's the Mike Pence is getting credit for something. And I want to tell the world that it was actually my idea, which I think was more likely what happened. So here's how everything went down.

Mike Pence was in... No, no, no, no.

He was actually in Las Vegas. And what happened was he flew to Indianapolis for this game. It was the Colts versus the 49ers. Now... As he's prone to do, as he often does. Yeah, which apparently he hasn't been to a game in forever,

even though he obviously used to be someone who worked there.

...