Welcome to the Safety Third podcast. Today we're going to start off by admiring the new Safety Third shirt.

Alan, you look great and your shirt looks even greater.

Look at how soft and embedded in the fabric it is.

I went on a whole tirade on our Patreon server about how cool this shirt is.

And I'm not saying that to convince you to buy it. I'm saying that because it is a very nice shirt.

I feel like a new man.

I honestly, I was a different person before I put the shirt on and it was a worst person.

Now everyone thinks we're being sarcastic.

I'm 100% serious.

Nigel, I'm bored.

In what way were you bad, Alan, that it made you less bad?

Just, you know, my skin was rougher because I was wearing inferior cloth and now it's smoother.

But the inferior cloth has more of an abrasive action that would smooth your skin down.

That's not how it works for the soul, dude. Yeah, that's not how it's not constantly

exfoliating you.

You ever seen a runner with bloody nipples?

I've heard of it. I've also heard of them peeing while they're running. I never did that cross-country stuff, but that's what I heard. He never really ran.

I remember there were guys in cross-country that had much apparently softer nipples than some of the other guys and their shirts would abrade them to the point where they bled, so they'd have to wear pasties.

You sure, maybe they just weren't like, like, I don't know, it was a weird evolutionary thing for if your babies were vampire bats and that's how you would feed them.

Maybe that's what male nipples are for.

I think you may be on something.

Yes, it's called the safety third t-shirt and it's so, how much does this thing cost?

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