We're all here to connect with people man. It's at the top of our list like you know human being human is about

Connecting and you know what that means I think the problem is time to what you said is what we place the value on that connection.

And so I think for a lot of men that are young that have been fed to the world, the value comes

from how attractive the person is that you're dating, right?

And the problem is, biologically, from my research, it seems like that needs to be true right for most men they need to be

physically attracted on some level to their partner I think the problem is it should stop there

that should be your initial switch and say,

cool, am I physically attracted this person

enough to want to be intimate with them to be close,

all that great.

Then start looking as well at the bigger picture

besides just, you know, what's on the outside right

like how you have your time together do you get along do you share values and so I'm not

against people wanting healthier connection like more connections for happiness because I think that is huge peace

It's just about what constitutes a healthy happy connection and for a lot of young men and even men into their 30s, it's like great, most importantly, is it a hot person?

And then they don't often challenge themselves much further than that.

And then for women, it's the same way.

It's often, how does this person make me feel?

And a lot of times they choose partners who, you know, they feel great around,

they feel excited aroused you know adventurous they

laugh they have a great sense of humor and then that stops there and again it's

not it doesn't progress towards always like, well, am I

...