Welcome to Douglas Wilson's Blog and May Blog, presented by Canon Press.

Nice guys and jerks, January 5th, 2022.

You're Dawson.

I think you've laid enough groundwork now.

Let's go back and do some post-game analysis of your breakup with Jan.

Now, keep in mind that some of this might sting a little bit, but that is a whole lot

better than the long-term chronic misery that results from not facing up to these sorts

of things.

The point, of course, is not to rub your nose and the mistakes you made, but rather to

head off and prevent similar mistakes in the formation of any new relationship.

The first thing to recognize is the fact that you didn't see the breakup coming, means

that you probably still don't understand the causes of it.

You were thinking of your position in the relationship as being stronger than it actually

was, Romans 12-3.

And this means that you were looking at the wrong markers, the wrong indicators.

Some of what I'm about to say, in Antsion, I both observed a few times we met with you

guys, and some of it, I am deducing from certain descriptions and phrases in your letters.

That said, I think I'm pretty confident about what happened.

So here we go.

In your relationship, you were the quintessential nice guy, and would turn yourself inside

out to do whatever she wanted.

And that is how you drove her off.

...