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Am I the Jerk?

Nerdy Guy believes he's in a Relationship with Woman - r/NeckBeardStories

Am I the Jerk?

amithejerk.com

Relationships, Society & Culture

4.83.2K Ratings

🗓️ 27 January 2022

⏱️ 16 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

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Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Today's story is actually a story that was sent in by a few people.

0:03.6

Apparently it's a legendary story but I don't know anything about this and it creates a whole

0:09.0

saga of its own. If you want to submit your own stories you can do so via the links down below

0:13.6

but don't forget to drop a thumbs up, subscribe with notifications turned on and follow on Spotify.

0:18.8

This story comes from neckbeard stories and is titled The Introduction of Good Sir Samuel.

0:25.0

Or why am I stomach now turns at the smell of spaghetti sauce?

0:28.9

Hi everyone, it's Lady Saber.

0:31.2

Player 1 is me, Lady Saber, 16 years old at the time. I'm finished, I grew up in Belgium,

0:36.7

here in America on a two-year exchange program at this time. I'm still new to the country,

0:41.6

school, going through a culture shock, I'm heavy and defensing, it's been my sport for something

0:46.1

like 10 years. For neckbeards this seems to make me the katana-wielding malady of their dreams.

0:52.2

Player 2 is smooth-cheeked neckbeard, we'll call him Samuel Tarley.

0:57.5

Fat as all get out, wears cargo shorts, bezinga shirt, sandals and yes, the fedora.

1:03.4

He also smells like sweats and old spaghetti sauce. He has a really high-pitched,

1:08.2

nasally voice that sounds like a whiny toddler. Player 3 is John, he shares half of my courses

1:14.0

and is really good at chess. He has his southern accent that I can listen to all day.

1:18.2

I'm keeping his description limited so that I don't sound obsessive.

1:22.0

I met Samuel at chess club. I'm pretty aware that it's a neckbeard spawn point by now,

1:27.2

but I go because I like to play. There are some good apples like John, so I was mostly there

1:32.1

just to talk to him. However, today he's running late and gets upstaged by Samuel.

1:37.7

I'm sending up the board and the seat across from me is empty, so Samuel asks me to play.

1:42.7

I politely try to turn him down telling him that I was waiting for someone.

...

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