Narrative Focused Trauma Care® with Becky Allender
The Allender Center Podcast
The Allender Center
4.7 • 648 Ratings
🗓️ 13 March 2026
⏱️ 49 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
Have you been living within a role for years—only to wonder if there is more of you still waiting to be known?
For decades, Becky Allender stood faithfully behind the scenes, supporting Dan's work, praying as an intercessor, helping build what would become the Allender Center. Yet she also carried the ache of being "in the room" without fully feeling she had a seat at the table. In today's conversation, she names the cost of that tension, and the courage it took to step forward.
When Becky chose to participate in Narrative Focused Trauma Care—the very framework her husband helped create—something began to shift. Through the steady presence of skilled facilitators and courageous companions, she encountered grief she hadn't fully named and discovered a growing kindness toward parts of herself long defended or hidden.
What followed was not only personal healing, but relational transformation. Through the language she gained and interactions she experienced, her relationship with Dan deepened. Repair with her daughters became possible. Her love for her parents softened and expanded. And from that engagement with her story emerged a clearer sense of calling—expressed in her teaching, leadership, and her memoir, Hidden in Plain Sight.
Perhaps most compelling is this: Becky began this work after decades of marriage, motherhood, and ministry. It was not too late. And it is not too late for you.
What might you be missing by staying in the role you've always carried? And what new life could unfold if you trusted that your story is still being written?
*This episode mentions an incident of rape; listener discretion is advised.
About the Allender Center Podcast:
For over a decade, the Allender Center Podcast has offered honest, thoughtful conversations about the deep work of healing and transformation. Hosted by Dr. Dan Allender and Rachael Clinton Chen, MDiv, this weekly podcast explores the complexities of trauma, abuse recovery, story, relationships, and spiritual formation. Through questions submitted by listeners, stories, interviews, and conversations, we engage the deep places of heartache and hope that are rarely addressed so candidly in our culture today. Join the Allender Center Podcast to uncover meaningful perspectives and support for your path to healing and growth.
At the Allender Center, we value thoughtful dialogue across a wide range of voices, stories, and lived experiences. In that spirit, our podcast features guests and hosts who may hold differing perspectives. The perspectives shared on this podcast by guests and hosts reflect their own experiences and viewpoints and do not necessarily represent the views, positions, or endorsements of the Allender Center and/or The Seattle School of Theology & Psychology.
Stream each episode, plus find transcripts, additional resources, and more at:
theallendercenter.org/podcast
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https://theallendercenter.org/2025/11/podcast-support/
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Thank you for listening to the Allender Center podcast. |
| 0:06.7 | I'm Dr. Dan Allender. |
| 0:08.7 | And I'm Rachel Clinton-Centen. |
| 0:10.5 | We're fiercely committed to providing hope and healing to a fragmented world. |
| 0:14.7 | And restoration for the heart. |
| 0:17.2 | Thank you for joining us. |
| 0:18.5 | Let's get this conversation started. |
| 0:30.1 | Thank you for joining us. Let's get this conversation started. Well, good people with good bodies. I am delighted today to be joined by Dan Allender, |
| 0:36.6 | who will be taking more of a backseat in this |
| 0:39.9 | conversation as we make space for a very beloved and delightful guest, Becky Allender. So welcome, Becky. |
| 0:50.7 | It's great to be here. Thank you, Rachel. And let me just be clear. I am in the backseat, |
| 0:56.5 | and I am so intrigued to hear the conversation. Yeah, we are delighted to start having more of an |
| 1:04.0 | intentional series, maybe like monthly, where we are talking to alumni from our narrative-focused trauma care training. |
| 1:13.3 | And Becky Allender, to me, is definitely a VIP alumni of narrative-focused trauma care, |
| 1:19.7 | all levels of training, but also a founder of this work. |
| 1:23.6 | And so you hold such a, you know, your unique purview in being one that has seen the |
| 1:31.1 | development of, you know, what we would talk about at the Allender Center as not only trainings |
| 1:37.3 | that we offer, but actually like core to our healing methodology. So we can talk more about that as things unfold. But, |
| 1:45.9 | you know, you obviously, you and Dan have been married for many years now. And you've kind of |
| 1:53.0 | witnessed his vocational formation, but you've also been a participant in that in many iterations. |
| 2:01.5 | And certainly, you were at the table and had a, you know, were very pivotal in the formation of the Allender Center, which now it was, oh my gosh, 16 years ago that we started talking about this center as like a real entity. |
| 2:21.5 | So maybe we can start there and you could share a little bit about just what it's been like |
... |
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