Dr. Naesli.

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Now let's get to the story.

My child died after only a month on this earth.

I'm going to spare myself the tears on explaining how.

But the tears of my wife are ones I'll never forget.

Grief is ugly.

It's so fucking ugly.

When we lost him, it sounded as if my wife was regurgitating fragments of her soul.

Her whales could have shattered glass, curdled blood.

The cries would turn to screams.

Screams at the universe, at which ever sick, twisted higher power would let this happen.

She would scream at herself and at me.

She'd scream until the skin of her throat shredded to ribbons.

I'll be honest, I didn't cry.

I don't remember if I even shed a tear, but not because I wasn't upset.

I didn't cry, because it felt like she was already doing it for me.

...