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Try and 11 Jennifer. Welcome to the program.

Yes, hi, Dr. Laura. I'm a long time listener. I'm my kid mom and my husband's girlfriend and I'm honored to speak with you today.

Thank you.

I have a question. I have a child that is celebrating their 16th birthday and my sister and I planned a trip just verbally that we wanted to go take them to a big city for their birthday.

So we I saved on my calendar. I kept it in front of me.

Wait, wait, wait, who all how many kids whose kids what are we talking about? So it's yeah, yeah, it's I have I have four kids, but it was just going to be my eldest son and my husband and I and it was going to be her husband and her and her eldest daughter who is turning 16 as well.

So their cousins.

Okay, got it. Yep, so we I've had it on the calendar. We we didn't buy tickets or anything, but I was on I was visiting her and I asked her, Hey, is this trip still happening?

And she said, Yeah, I bought the ticket and I said you bought the tickets for the trip and she said, Yeah, and I said, Well, who's going and she said, Well, I changed my mind.

I'm going to take my whole family on this trip and I said, Well, you know, you're why don't you tell me you could have called me.

I would have had no problem with you going. I just needed to know that the plan to change and she kind of him and hot and said, Well, I didn't want you to feel bad.

I couldn't financially go and I said, Well, I could make that decision myself.

And and she said, Well, why don't you go and I said, Well, the whole trip has changed because now it's all your kids. So now I'm going to have to make a decision to bring all my kids.

So it's kind of all changed.

And so I said, You know what you guys go ahead, have your trip will do something else, you know, no worries.

But I and so now I'm getting text messages with this trip and all these plans and I'm like, I don't know how to really interact because I'm still pretty frustrated about the fact that she did it without us without even I mean, even coming back to me.

But even saying, Hey, I need to change the plan. She never communicated that. And now she went back like it just never happened. So I don't I really don't know what to do moving forward because we tend to plan things together.

Moving forward plan the vacation with you, your husband and your son like you originally wanted to do.

And let this go. It was a vague plan. You took it a little more seriously than she did. And she decided she really wanted to do something different. And she didn't have the class to tell you about it.

But you know, this is a small bump in the road to her to relationship over.

So use this time to just I don't if you if she does this all the time that you're an idiot for making plans with somebody who does this all the time.

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