We had this heartbreaking to read emails from disheartened wives like this one from a listener

named Stephanie Hello Pastor John.

Thank you for this satisfying podcast in reference to episode 1301, prioritizing marriage

over work and the older episode about husbands leading their wives, oh how I long to be

led by my husband in the ways that you describe, but he's not there.

I've hoped and prayed for it and asked of it from him for many years now.

I want to pray together regularly, husband and wife meetings, spiritual goals, and many

other important things involved in storing a family.

But I feel like I'm pulling a ship up a mountain.

He wants to take life easy and enjoys TV and sports I long for deeper things.

I recognize it's not my job or in my control to change him.

I've been married for 14 years now.

What would you say to me Pastor John, a waiting wife?

It's really significant when Stephanie says, I realize it's not my job or in my control

to change him.

Now mainly I want to agree with that, but not entirely.

So let me give the qualification and then circle back to agree with her.

My agreement is that she's right in the end only God can go deep with her husband and

awaken the kinds of longings and passions that she is eager to see.

I think her impulse is right that efforts to change a husband usually backfire because

he may so easily interpret your efforts as making him a project or treating him like

a child or oppressing him with endless disapproval.

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