You can't fully suppress your dark side.

And I think dad had a second problem from when he was young, but he assumed that he had

overcome something was going on in his young life.

And this is what a lot of people don't tell you about polygamous families, especially

down in there in Colorado City.

There was some crazy stuff going on from what I've heard.

And back when dad was young, the kids, they were doing a lot of crazy things.

Like it was just kind of a mess.

They weren't, they weren't being watched good enough for the type of situation they were in.

And that's why dad was so strict with us.

Because I think he developed these problems as a young boy. There was a bunch of people in his father's home that manifested

when he was the prophet as marrying 12 year olds. I am above mortality essentially. I don't have to

deal with those problems like you guys do. Okay, now it's

God's will that I do this. And he didn't talk about these things for hours just to try to

brainwash people. He talked about them for hours because he believed in him.

What have I been doing? Lay down my autonomy.

After that, it got very dark very quickly.

Hey guys, my name is Shalise Ansela, and this is Colts to Consciousness, where we discuss leaving high demand religions or organizations and finding healing and independence through awareness and true

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