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It was just like this feeling that I was always being watched. I was always being evaluated, and I was always at risk of disappointing someone.

If you allowed yourself to be alone with someone of the opposite sex, something like this was going to happen.

I had no comprehension of consent. I didn't understand what happened. So I was blaming myself, really,

and I just felt the only way to fix it was to marry him. This fellowship thing is not just a religious

label. It's social erasure. When everyone you've known your entire life just drunks you as if you never existed as if

you never mattered as if you were never important to them because i believe that what they did

was right i thought that i was the one that was wrong it was so deeply embedded in my mind

for jehovah's witnesses accepting a blood transfusion is considered a serious sim, even in

life-threatening circumstances.

So I needed a blood transfusion, and I refused it.

My blood count was literally three, and my body went into hypopolemic shock.

Mine is the only voice. What have I been doing? and my body went into hypopulemic shock.

Mine is the only voice.

What have I been doing?

Lay down my autonomy.

After that, it got very dark very quickly.

Hey guys, my name is Shalise Ansela and this is Colts to Consciousness where we discuss leaving high demand religions or organizations and finding healing and independence through

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