You might have heard this about marriage. It's a fairly common phrase, men want respect.

And I'd observe the same is also true for boys. Even at a young age, boys want respect. I'm John Fuller along

with Danny Werta who leads our parenting team here at Focus on the Family.

We're going to begin today with a conversation

Jim Daly and I had with Rhonda Stoppy. She's a mom who has adult children and

she's pretty candid about some of the lessons she's learned about in the mother-son communication there's so much there and I observe it as the husband and father of our two team boys and watching

Gene you know communicate with our boys and vice versa

But you mentioned something in the book and I think it's I don't

know if it's a chapter title but because I told you so. I mean I can hear that and

my own mom even saying that you know just do it because I told you so

what's a good way to motivate and what's a bad way to motivate we need to earn their

respect from the time they're very little so that because I told you so can

be an answer if it needs to be and they have to be a work and they're pretty young and we

want to establish that and again because I had mentors in my life that helped me from the time

my kids were young to build that

respect in them but what we have to realize is there's a section in the book

mom's raising sons called train his brain we have to teach him to think. My son-in-law worked at a Christian

college down in Southern California and he said the kids that were raised in a

really secure Christian home but were kind of in a really secure Christian home, but we're kind of in a bubble that maybe never had

the internet, never had video games, we're homeschooled, all of those things, left their

home doing very well, but they did not know how to self-discipline.

They did not know how to discern.

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