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Psychology In Seattle Podcast
Kirk Honda
4.6 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 5 July 2021
⏱️ 75 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
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Trigger Warning: This episode may include topics such as assault, trauma, and discrimination. If necessary, listeners are encouraged to refrain from listening and care for their safety and well-being.
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hey, just having listeners. Just me today. I thought I would answer some of your questions. This |
| 0:04.2 | first question is, why would someone have deep insecurity about being lovable, even though they |
| 0:10.6 | had good enough parents and experienced unconditional love and of question? Yeah. This is an interesting |
| 0:18.7 | question relevant, particularly to this podcast since I am so often connecting relationship issues, |
| 0:25.1 | attachment issues, emotional issues as an adult to issues with parenting early in life, particularly |
| 0:31.5 | early in life. And some people will say, well, I had a pretty good childhood and yet I have deep |
| 0:39.8 | insecurities as an adult or research shows that sometimes that happens. Well, there's a number |
| 0:47.2 | of different possibilities and it's impossible to know. It's all just conceptualization. We don't |
| 0:52.2 | have the science yet and I don't foresee it happening in my lifetime to be able to measure these |
| 0:59.8 | things. So there's too many things that play. There are multiple things happening to children |
| 1:05.8 | and adults that can impact their psychology. There are multiple ways to interpret it. Our brains |
| 1:12.2 | are very odd organs that don't always behave in ways that are predictable. So we just don't have |
| 1:21.6 | the ability to know for sure. But conceptualization wise, here's what I will often look towards as |
| 1:28.0 | hypotheses. One is that, yeah, so you'll have an adult. They'll be like, I have deep insecurities. |
| 1:34.0 | I think I have preoccupied attachment and my parents were really great. I didn't have any traumas. |
| 1:38.4 | Everything was fine. There are a number of possibilities that I've often investigated and found |
| 1:44.6 | to seem to be a good candidate as to why that would happen. One is that for some people, |
| 1:51.8 | when they look back on their childhood, they see parents and family life that was pretty good. |
| 1:58.8 | But it's hard to detect what was actually going wrong in the parenting. For example, |
| 2:05.2 | you can have a, and I've treated clients like this. You can have a parenting style that is very |
| 2:11.9 | loving and very secure and non-chaotic and non-abusive, where the child throughout their life |
| 2:20.4 | knows absolutely. My parents love me. My parents will always be there for me. My parents are not |
... |
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