4.8 • 32.8K Ratings
🗓️ 28 July 2014
⏱️ 79 minutes
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0:00.0 | Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Byrd and it's the Monday morning podcast from Monday, July 28th, 2014. |
0:09.0 | What's going on? How, what's it going? I just got back from Montreal, Canada doing the wonderful Montreal comedy festival. |
0:20.0 | I had an awesome time up there. I hosted one of their galas, you know, which is a big deal. And, you know, I'm not big on hosting. |
0:32.0 | I'm not big on hosting because I have my bits are long and it's sort of like I don't really not a writer jokes. |
0:38.0 | So there's a lot of cursing and making faces and I build momentum off of that. So I just keep fucking rolling with that. |
0:45.0 | And before people realize that they've listened to an hour of my shit and I get out of there. |
0:50.0 | But if I host, I got to keep coming back out and I got to get that energy going again. And, you know, it's fucking exhausting. |
0:59.0 | So, to be honest with you, I didn't want to do it. You know, see, probably like, well, Bill, then why the fuck did you say, yeah, I'll do it. |
1:07.0 | I'll tell you why because I bought the money pit house. That's why I am out there, hooring myself. I'm going to tell you right now, because I was going to take the whole fucking summer off. |
1:22.0 | I was going to take the rest of July and August off because I toured like fucking 18 months straight. And all over this great global fucking marble. |
1:31.0 | And I was just like, look, I'm taking two months off. Bound, bound, bound, right. I was going to have a great fucking time. I'm bringing it barely back. Yeah. |
1:41.0 | And I was just going to fucking chill out and grill. I was going to sit on my fucking back porch. I was going to stare off into the fucking half a yard that I have out here in LA, which is actually considered a decent yard. |
1:56.0 | Do you know you can't throw a frisbee in my backyard without hitting something. |
2:02.0 | I mean, it right as it leaves your hand, it probably, if I go the long ways, I decide I could maybe float for just under three seconds. |
2:13.0 | It's not really a yard. I have an area. All right, whatever. I live in a metropolis. So anyways, |
2:23.0 | yeah, so I was going to take the whole summer off. And you know, as these guys finished this one thing that they were going to do, the area that got damaged by the fucking water. |
2:32.0 | And this is what I learned when your house is fucking like a hundred years old, 90 years old, whatever this thing is. It's just you have 90 fucking year. |
2:43.0 | Well, let's say the first 10 years, everything's going pretty smooth. You about from about 80 years in all the way back 80 all the way up to right now, you just have one. |
2:54.0 | Do it yourself. |
2:56.0 | Fucking job. Hey, I got a guy. I got a guy. She'll do it for nothing. Man. It's a 1930. See, there's a there's no code. Nothing. |
3:08.0 | I mean, nothing. Nothing downstairs in my house was up to code. Nothing. I know what you guys are thinking like, well, hey, |
3:20.0 | then you get somebody to inspect the house when you bought it. Yeah, but they can't see into the fucking walls. |
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