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Monday Morning Podcast

Monday Morning Podcast 2-8-16

Monday Morning Podcast

All Things Comedy

Comedy

4.832.8K Ratings

🗓️ 9 February 2016

⏱️ 68 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

Bill rambles about the Broncos, three toed sloths and putting your dick on the table.

Transcript

Click on a timestamp to play from that location

0:00.0

Hey, what's going on? It's Bill Byrne. It's time for the Monday morning podcast for Monday, February 8th, 2016. What's going on? Everybody? Oh, yeah. Huh?

0:12.0

Huh? Oh, my darling. Oh, my darling. Oh, my darling. Denver Colorado. Bunch of hip please and some minors and then one. So both trophy.

0:26.0

Congratulations to everybody in Rocky Mountain. Hi, Colorado.

0:32.0

Killing fucking cows and stinky greedy. Um, Greedy Colorado, man. You ever want to know, you know, what a bunch of murdered cows smell like for the next time you eat a burger.

0:44.0

I suggest you go there on a bad smell day. That's what they call a bad smell day and then you call up the slaughterhouse. You're like, hey, could you fucking.

0:53.0

Could you fucking tone it down a little? You know, the winds blowing down in my house. Why don't you lay off killing those fucking cows?

1:00.0

You know, not saying that don't like the bird. Right? Everybody likes the bird. Set them hippies in San Francisco and all those limousine liberals out in Hollywood.

1:12.0

Um, out there eating their fucking tofu patties. You know that shit calls as cancer. Don't you? The fuck is a tofu?

1:20.0

Um, sorry. Congratulations to the Denver Broncos and guess what? Oh, Billy Redface. He won a little bit of money betting on the old, the old man.

1:30.0

The old man.

1:32.0

Oh, river. Um, sorry. Um, very happy for a Peyton Manning man. I just, I didn't want to see him go in there because his fucking ass kicked and I know what you guys are thinking.

1:44.0

How did you bet on the Broncos? You didn't say shit, predicting one way or the other. Um, I didn't have, uh, I didn't have any feeling one way or the other on the, uh, on the game.

1:58.0

I thought what a lot of people thought I just thought the fucking panthers were going to, if they got up early, it was going to get ugly.

2:04.0

And, uh, I don't know, but then just everybody was saying it. Everybody kept fucking saying it. You know, dude, the panthers, dude, it's not even going to be a fucking day, too.

2:14.0

Everyone was just saying that the panthers were going to fucking destroy. They went away by 17. Dude, it's going to be 17, not to buy you in the first quarter. This is what all my friends was saying.

2:25.0

So I came up with this quick theory, because I wanted to put money on the game, you know, because my team wasn't in it and I wasn't really excited about it.

2:35.0

So I figured, all right, well, if everybody's saying the panthers are right, how does Vegas make any money? The only way Vegas makes money is if the Broncos win.

2:47.0

And I always has the lights on, even during the day, they never shut them off. They got the AC on what the fucking doors open. And I don't see anybody concerned out there. Right.

2:57.0

Is it making money? So I said, fuck it. I'm going to go against a grain. I didn't even take the points. I just bet it, I bet the line, 100 to make 190, through 100 bucks on it.

3:07.0

And they, Jesus Christ. I guess that Denver Broncos defense was, was as good as they were saying. I just thought, like, I thought we made them look better than they were because our offensive line was fucking beat up.

3:21.0

But I don't know if you noticed the entire time when the Broncos beat the Patriots at no point was Tom Brady comfortable. He wasn't screaming and yelling like, yeah, let's go man.

3:33.0

Whatever the fucking yells at his receivers. You know, it was supposed to be a post pattern. Wake up. Right. Whatever the fucking is he yells at him. He didn't do that once.

...

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