You talk about this psychological contracting, which sounds like that's what that was.

You sort of did that inadvertently, didn't you?

You talked about it on, were you on honeymoon and you sort of sat down.

We were on our third date.

Third date.

Yeah.

And you sat down and wrote what was important to you.

And I think, you know, what I find in my research is every single couple has a psychological

contract. Every couple has a deal. Most couples just don't discuss it, right? They just fall into it.

And the couples that do really well are those that discuss like what is the deal between us.

Tell me what that looks like. How does someone do that? So it's really about

talking about things in three areas. So one is what really matters to us. So what are the things

we're going to pursue above everything else? And that might be like a specific career goal,

one or the other of you have. It might be how can we work enough that we achieve our goals,

but not enough so we have enough time for these things outside of work. It might be something

about, right, what kind of couple do we want to be? You know, we want to be a couple who's really

embedded in our community. Having those principles, those kind of yardsticks laid down is really

important because this is what we measure

our life by. These are the things that, you know, if you're not careful, you wake up five years later

and you're like, this isn't where I wanted to be. You hear it all the time, don't you? You just,

you just sleepwalk. It's so easy to sleepwalk through life because it's so busy.

And particularly at that period where we have younger children. Yeah. From kind of first

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