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Where Shelley?

This is Fixing Famous People, the podcast where two reality television producers pitch solutions

to save celebrities in dire straits. But first, let's get to the prefix, your weekly

pop culture roundup. I'm about to announce some pride and summer performances, and I'm finding it

ironic that as I do so, it is approximately 40 degrees in New York City today. I know you're mad.

Who do I talk to about this? I can no longer take this. Am I just an old faggot from Long

Island now where I'm just looking at Florida and I'm thinking, well, I wouldn't move to Florida.

I'll go to Puerto Rico. But still, it's too late. It's too late to be this cold. It's very cold today. I kept up and I said, it's cold. It's so cold. And you love. You love a wrap, a wool wrap. Love the cold. And I said, I've seen you sit in the blazing sun dressed. Yeah. Truly to climb Mount Everest, truly. Like, I've seen you do it. So this is news, Mother Nature. If you're listening, and I know you are, bitch. Get it together. Like, this is, it's too cold. I need the seasons back. Yeah. I'm not worried about global warming anymore. I'm worried about like this cosmic joke where it's 85, five days ago, and today it's quite

literally 40.

Yes, but I feel that is this not April in New York is like every two days.

...