Hey, it's Jean.

Let's pause the intro music.

We don't even have time for that.

This is a pep talk for those of you who are hiding in a closet or a bathroom

at a family gathering over the holidays.

You might have gained a ton of growth and confidence prior to the holidays only to walk

into a family scenario and watch yourself revert into an old role, a bossy sister, a baby brother,

a timid mouth, an angry child.

Listen, this can feel super scary and unsafe or just plain

bewildering. And maybe you're saying to yourself, has my family do this to me? So you might feel

like you were doing so good and now you backslid like decades. Well, and then you think maybe I'm not doing as well as I thought. I just

want to say to you, hold on. What's happening to you is completely normal and it isn't necessarily

your family's fault, at least not entirely. Here's what I've learned. Going to these old

family of origin situations can cause everyone, including you, to default

into ingrained patterns without even thinking about it. And that means that while you, the growing,

healing, amazing you somehow slips into an old pattern, so can everyone else. So here's the good news. If you're hiding away

and you're listening to this mini podcast, you've recognized it and you're choosing to break out of it.

See, the power of recovery has even followed you here. So how do you break it? Well, here's what my

therapist taught me to do in these situations.

And since I've spent a ton of money on therapy, I figure I can really make that money go farther by sharing what I've learned with other people.

So first, close your eyes and see yourself in a role that brings out your best self.

Now, for me, this means crouching down and comforting my grandson.

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