Welcome guys and gals to The Man Talk Show. I'm Connor Beaton and today we're going to talk about the

illusion of try. Now listen, I don't know about you, but any time that I have heard people say,

oh, I'm trying to lose weight, or I'm trying to improve my relationship, or I'm trying to get

this promotion, or I'm trying to start my business, it's always said in this way like there's a big part of them that doesn't believe that it's going to happen.

And there was a perfect example of this that I saw the other day in a Tony Robbins event where he's interacting with this woman.

And she's standing up and she's holding the microphone and she's talking to Tony and she's saying,

Tony, you know, like I'm trying to fix my marriage and I, you know, I've tried to read, I've tried

reading all the books and I've tried doing all the courses and I've tried having the conversations

with my husband, but nothing seems to be working. I feel like I've tried everything and I'm still

failing. And Tony pauses for a second and he looks at and he says, okay, we're going to do something here and I just want you to go along with it. Is it okay? And she says, yeah, sure. And classic Tony Robbins, he doesn't tell anybody what the hell he was doing. He just goes for it. So he says, I want you to turn around and I want you to try and pick up the chair that you were just

sitting in. And so the woman kind of looks puzzled, but she says, okay, and she turns around and she grabs the chair and she picks it up, and she turns around and she faces Tony, and she's holding the chair facing Tony Robbins. And he says, okay, great. So you didn't do what you didn't do what I told you to do, you actually picked up the chair. I want you to try and pick up the chair.

So put the chair back down. So you didn't do what I told you to do. You actually picked up the chair. I want you to try and pick up the chair. So put the chair back down. So the woman turns back around. She puts the chair back down. And she looks pretty puzzled. So she turns back around to him and sort of waits instruction. He says, okay, try and pick up the chair. So she turns back around. She picks up the chair and faces Tony again. He says, no, you picked it up. I want you to try and pick it up. Don't pick it up. Try and pick it up. And so she puts the chair back down and she still looks puzzled. And there's a few people laughing in the audience because the people watching this are now really starting to get the distinction that Tony is making. So she turns back around.

She picks up the chair for the third time and she turns back to Tony and she's got this little

smile on her face. And Tony says, oh, what are you smiling about? And she says, I think I get what

you're saying. And he says, great, put the chair back down, try and pick it up. So she puts the chair back down and she turns back

around and she starts trying to pick up this chair and she's pretending, she's not lifting it off

the ground. She's sort of moving it around a little bit and pushing it and like pretending that it's

too heavy for her to lift up. Like she doesn't have the strength in her legs and her arms to lift up this chair. And, you know, everybody starts laughing because she's like, oh, yeah, she's got it. She's got it. And she turns back around after not picking up the chair. And he says, do you see how you have not been actually working on and fixing your relationship? And she says, yeah. And then they have this

other dialogue. You know, they go into this huge dialogue about it. But this was such a great example

because so many of us are doing this in our life. We say, I want to, I'm trying to make more money.

I'm trying to start this business. I'm trying to fix my relationship or be a better husband or

father or mother or business owner. And the reality is that try is an illusion. Try is an illusion. And not only

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