Congratulations on choosing to join our award-winning Ocean View community.

Now that you'll be a permanent resident, there are a few things you should know.

The first is, of course, that Ocean View recently received one of the bridge's most esteemed honors.

The Golden Shell for Best Seaside Attraction. one of the bridge's most esteemed honors, the golden shell for best seaside attraction.

This prestigious accolade was bestowed upon your new home for the tenth year in a row.

Aren't you lucky to be living in such a fun, interactive, and vibrant town.

You'll find that despite being located in the middle of the Atlantic, there are many amenities

that your friends on land won't ever have.

Why?

Once they hear about Ocean View's underwater gym, now with two brand new workout classes,

including Zumba, there's no doubt they'll want to give up their lacklustre time on the shore

and live here where the grass is greener because it was specifically created to blur the lines between artificial and organic.

And if your friends and family do express an interest in joining us in Ocean View,

you're required to refer them to us.

Please don't push your luck.

We'll know if you fail to comply.

All three of our astronomy towers are stocked with the most scientifically advanced equipment in the world.

You'll be able to look out at the stars at night and ponder your place in the universe,

while browsing through countless high-definition images of stars, planets, and other galaxies.

Try not to think too hard about how someone in another galaxy is watching those same stars,

wondering the same thing you are.

What's the point to any of this?

...