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Trauma & Narcissism Redefined

Men Can Be Victims Of Narcissistic Abuse Too

Trauma & Narcissism Redefined

Caroline Strawson

Narcissisticabuse, Health & Fitness, Narcissist, Self-improvement, Education, Recovery, Mental Health, Trauma

4.8 • 701 Ratings

🗓️ 20 May 2025

⏱️ 82 minutes

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

In this powerful episode, I’m joined by Russell Tellup, a brave and deeply reflective man who opens up about the childhood abuse that shaped every corner of his life. From a young age, Russell was made to feel like the problem. Unseen. Unheard. Unloved. His sense of worth was crushed before it had a chance to form, leaving him to carry the unbearable belief that he didn’t matter.As we talk, Russell shares how those early wounds followed him into adulthood, leading him into relationships with narcissistic partners who mirrored the same emotional neglect and manipulation he experienced as a child. What unfolds in this conversation is raw and real. There are moments of deep sadness. There’s anger. And there’s a profound sense of clarity as he begins to piece together the lifelong pattern of trauma that kept him stuck as he now helps other men in this position.This is not just a story of pain, it’s a story of awakening. Russell’s courage to speak his truth is what transforms it. And in his vulnerability, you’ll find extraordinary strength.So often, we don’t hear the stories of men who’ve endured narcissistic abuse. But it happens. And it matters. Russell’s voice cuts through the silence and reminds us that abuse doesn’t discriminate, it just hides where shame lives.If you’ve ever felt like the black sheep, like you were never enough, or like you kept attracting the same kind of pain, you are not alone. This conversation will stay with you. Russell’s story is a reminder that even in the darkest places, there is the possibility of healing, and there is always power in finally being heard.If you need to get in touch with Russell, he has a private Facebook community for men: https://www.facebook.com/share/g/1AYsbsh7uw/Don’t ever be alone in your journey and make sure you come and join my private Facebook community, No Visible Bruises where you can connect with other survivors of narcissistic abuse, domestic abuse and coercive control:https://www.facebook.com/groups/novisiblebruisesDisclaimer:The views and opinions shared in this podcast are those of the individuals involved and are intended for informational and educational purposes only. They do not substitute professional or medical advice. If you’ve been affected by anything discussed in today’s episode, please consider reaching out to a qualified healthcare provider or mental health professional for support. You’re not alone, and help is always available

Transcript

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0:00.0

Welcome to No Visible Bruises, the podcast that shares real-life survivor stories of narcissistic abuse, domestic abuse and coercive control from a physiology first and nervous system perspective, because you can't think your way out of this. You need to feel to heal. I'm Caroline Strawson, a survivor myself and now a trauma expert and educator.

0:25.0

I am here to create change and understanding of the unseen abuse that we are not taught about

0:30.9

in schools and to heal from the inside out at a nervous system level.

0:36.0

Let's break the silence and change the narrative because we heal

0:40.5

together. In today's episode, we're actually interviewing a man. Yes, we do. Yes, I work with men,

0:53.9

absolutely. And actually, we need more men on this

0:57.1

podcast. So again, if you are a man and you want to come and share your story of no visible bruises,

1:02.8

I'll also put the link to come on the podcast in the show notes because it's vitally important

1:09.0

for all sexes to be on this podcast. And in today's

1:13.5

episode, I interview Russ Tellup. Now, this man is inspirational. His vulnerability that he

1:21.6

shares in this podcast is a sign of courage, is a sign of strength. But in our society, very often there is judgment,

1:30.4

and this comes from his childhood, the societal constraints around how a man is meant to show up,

1:37.6

silencing ourselves, not crying. And in this episode, we talk about Russ's childhood

1:43.6

and how his bad behavior, and I mean,

1:47.7

you know, there is a warning with this one. It is in-depth and what he is experienced is hard.

1:54.5

But how that led to the types of adult relationships that he was in and the wonderful, beautiful,

2:00.2

trauma healing journey that he is on. the wonderful, beautiful, beautiful trauma healing

2:01.8

journey that he is on. So whomever you are, this is an episode I really urge you to listen to

2:07.6

because Russ is so vulnerable, so open in sharing his experiences and also how he is moving

2:17.4

forward from that. So stay tuned and watch this episode

2:21.5

but get your tissues at the ready. So Russ, it's absolutely great to have you here because I know

2:27.9

a lot of people sometimes even say to me, Caroline, it's just women you seem to work with.

...

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