The McElroy brothers are not experts, and their advice should never be followed.

Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it.

Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mentioned only so the babies out there will know how cool

they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby.

Hello everyone, it's my brother, my brother and me in the time has come. Time to pay the

paper. Time to pay the paper. I'ma grab you fucking nerves by your socks, by your shoe meat.

I'm gonna shake you to all your changing dollars fall out. Get that paper in your

triangle. Thirsty my friends. Oops, your car keys came out too. Looks like I'm gonna have to sell

those for metal scrap. How's your goose been this year? I've had a fine crop of goofs, a bumper crop,

a goofs hair at McElroy farms. We've been given away for free, but here's the thing folks.

Now the pipe has come and he wants to see all those pickled peppers of potty humor that you've

been enjoying. He's got to pay him for them. Do you remember a time when the macarons used to give away

their goof crops for free? Peppered farm remembers. And now it's time to pay. Peppered farm always

collects on its debts. I can't hear you guys very well and I thought you were saying goose,

G-O-O-S-E, and I was like, you should let those around your pickle farm. They will do a number on

your crop. So anyway, it's time to pay a fucking piper. It's Max Fun Drive weeks and the fun,

the fun, the fun has stops and the drive begins. The max is important too because we need,

we want the maximum amount of the money that you can give us. And a lot of the other shows on

the network won't tow this hard a line. Yeah, yeah, they say it's even better about it. Oh,

you know, we offer. Here's, by my math, we've done about 30 good ones. I think about 30 good

and statistically it's pretty good. Which I think is better than those podcasts. And what you don't

know is actually the machine of comedy is lubricated by your money. So, move us up and let it

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