The following story is real because it actually happened and this is completely true.

Not joking.

I was in Frisco, Colorado and probably like winter of 2005.

I'm going to say that's about it.

And I was on a road trip with a bunch of friends and we were at the A&W parking lot there.

Don't know if they're selling A&W or not.

And we're all hanging out in the parking lot and one of my friends wanted to go in and

get something.

And I was like, oh, here I'll get it.

So I tossed her my wallet and she took it and went inside and bought the thing, came

right back out.

And as she's walking toward me with my wallet that she wants to return, I just held my right

hand up.

I think I'm getting all of this right.

I held my right hand up and I kind of made this rasp mutant eye contact with her, like

throw it to my hand, throw it into my, you throw it directly into my hand.

My eyes say to and says she goes to throw it into my hand, but she missed by a country

mile.

And it came up way short.

It was down by my foot.

And while maintaining this rasp mutant eye contact with her, I just flicked my foot forward

and perfectly kicked the wallet, which then spun rapidly directly into the hand that

...