Master Chief vs Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - Who Would Win Unleashed
Who Would Win
James Gavsie & Ray Stakenas
4.8 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 12 June 2025
⏱️ 50 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
In THIS episode of Who Would Win Unleashed, the cybernetically enhanced Spartan super-soldier Master Chief (championed by James Gavsie) takes on the lean, green, ninja machine known as the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (repped by Eric Holmes) in an all-out brawl across sewer tunnels, rooftops, and UNSC drop zones!
Armed with Mjolnir armor, military-grade tactics, AI support from Cortana, and a weapons locker full of alien-slaying firepower, Master Chief enters the battlefield as the embodiment of human perfection through science and war. But the TMNT aren’t just pizza-powered punks—they’re a mutant brotherhood of martial arts mastery: Leonardo’s precision, Donatello’s tech smarts, Raphael’s raw aggression, and Michelangelo’s unpredictably wild style combine into a chaotic ballet of turtle-powered teamwork.
As plasma grenades meet flying nunchaku and energy swords clash with twin katanas, this isn’t just a battle—it’s a clash of philosophies: lone-wolf military precision versus family-fueled ninja synergy.
Join hosts James and Eric as they dive deep into comic-book lore, gaming stats, ninja scrolls, Halo kill-streaks, sewer-level tactics, and next-gen durability debates. Will Earth’s last Spartan crush the turtle squad with tactical supremacy? Or will the half-shell heroes prove that four brothers are stronger than one lone legend?
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Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/who-would-win/donations
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/who-would-win/donations
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/who-would-win/donations
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Support this podcast at — https://redcircle.com/who-would-win/donations
Advertising Inquiries: https://redcircle.com/brands
Privacy & Opt-Out: https://redcircle.com/privacy
Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hello, Legion of Audience. This is James, and before we get started today, I wanted to take a second and let you all know about the brand new Who Would Win Patreon. |
| 0:08.8 | If you'd like to support the show and get behind the scenes access like you've never seen before, go to Patreon.com slash Who Would Win Show right now. |
| 0:16.6 | Who would win patrons will have access to outtake videos, early info on battles, and even get a vote on characters that will use in upcoming episodes. |
| 0:23.7 | So if you'd like to support me and the show, head to patreon.com slash who would win show. |
| 0:27.8 | And for as little as five bucks a month, you can define yourself as more than just a fan. |
| 0:32.4 | You'll be an official member of the Legion. |
| 0:34.7 | Hope to see you there. |
| 0:56.5 | And welcome to another episode of Who Would Win, a show that completely ignores anything important happening in the world and instead focuses on a fictional battle between characters from the worlds of comics, sci-fi, and fantasy. |
| 1:00.2 | I'm your host James Gabsia, and as always, I'm joined by the one and only Eric Holmes. |
| 1:05.3 | Woo! |
| 1:05.9 | In today's episode, an Emerald Armored Spartan Super Soldier guided by an unflavable AI AI, collides with four pizza-powered, shell-backed Ninja Brothers. |
| 1:14.8 | I'm surprised I said that without spitting, but the day, you know, the night is young. |
| 1:17.9 | In one corner, you have Master Chief, the Stoic Spartan Super Soldier, whose tactical genius and unbreakable resolve have saved humanity from galactic extinction. |
| 1:25.9 | And in the other corner, you have the teenage mutant turtles, for sewer-dwelling mutant brothers who blend razor-sharp |
| 1:31.3 | ninjitsu skills, wisecracking banter, and unwavering brotherhood to defend New York City. |
| 1:35.8 | As usual, I did the patented who would win Google test just to see how many times this |
| 1:39.4 | matchup has been discussed. |
| 1:40.6 | And this match has been discussed a few times not many but just a few which means |
| 1:44.7 | it's high time this battle got the who would win unleashed treatment eric i have to know what |
| 1:49.2 | are your thoughts in today's matchup yeah you already know man uh the amazing awesome uh you know |
| 1:57.3 | just iconic teenage mutant ninja turtles. |
| 2:01.1 | Like, this is going to be so much fun reping them. |
... |
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