You don't know me.

A confession I can't take back.

I am.

The masked speaker.

On a text of 788592 that says,

Sometimes when my kids are acting up, I tell them,

Oh, you don't like me, huh?

Well, after school today, we'll go to the mommy store and you can pick out a new mommy. And that shuts them up pretty quick. That's such a mom thing. It's going to backfire when they want to go. I feel like Jose wants to know where this mommy store is and if they went by the hour. Absolutely. I feel like he's been there before. Oh, man. I love the mommy store. Whoever texted that, I didn't send us more info.

I also call it the dollar store because I make it rain. Oh. Oh, that's a different type of... Mom's only worth a dollar? No, it's a different type of mom. Brooke is interested in it. Anyway, if you have something that you'd like to get off your chest, you can do it here on the mass speaker, guilt-free.

And one of our listeners says a juicy little tidbit they'd like to unload. He's chosen Oscar for his fake name. Oscar, welcome to the show, ma'am. Hey, how are you? I like that your persona is regal. Oscar always sounds like a regal name to me. Oh, I think of our intern Oscar immediately.

Yeah, me too. Oh, that's the opposite. Or the person that lives in the garbage can, but we can too, yeah. Well, that's Regal and Brooksworth. Yeah. You have a garbage can all yourself. Oscar, voice changer is on. You are now the mass speaker. Whenever you're ready, let's hear your confession. So I realize that you guys and probably all the listeners are probably going to hate me for this.

Oh.

Oh, we're starting off with that.

Okay.

Do you hate yourself for it?

No, actually, I've really come to terms with this.

Oh.

Okay.

So I got married. I have been for a couple years now. My wife and I are

really good friends. We have a great relationship. Everything's been going well, and it's been great.

But when I was younger, I dated around a lot, and I was, you know, kind of a ladies man,

I think, anyway.

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