You don't know me.

A confession I can't take back.

I am.

The masked speaker.

Text to 78592 says, when I was 14, I memorized pie to 20 decimal places, thinking it had impressed girls and get me action.

It would have impressed Alexis. She did the same thing. She did it. It's so cool.

He says five years later, the only person who was impressed was my science teacher, Mr. Willoughby,

who asked me to film a video of it for his niece.

See kids? Math is cool.

Oh, it's so pure.

Sounds like Mr. Willoughby knows a bad boy when he sees one.

And if you're bad, we won't film you, but we will let you confess your naughty little secrets here on the radio while keeping you perfectly anonymous.

And we have a guy on the line who's chosen Drew as his fake name. Drew, welcome to the show, ma'am. Hey, how are you done? I don't know if you know, but to be allowed on the show, you have to go to at least the 14th point of pie. We're going to quiz you on that after we're done getting your secret, so be ready. voice changer is on you are the mass speaker whenever you're ready

let's hear your confession

okay um

I got married about six years ago

congratulations

do we say congratulations

because it's part of the confession

we have been burned so many times

congratulating people on their marriages

we've totally stopped.

...