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Music.

You know, I know.

I know.

I know.

It's hard to believe you're in the same room with me.

Happy Wednesday, everyone. President Trump has given orders to obliterate Iran if the regime assassinate him.

Big deal. I get obliterated every night, said one woman.

President Trump also suggested taking over Gaza, his first project,

opening a gentleman's club called the Gaza Strip. Why not? Democrats have already filed new impeachment articles against Trump over his proposed plan in

Gaza.

Well, there goes their free lap dances at the Gaza Strip.

President Trump's proposed budget bill will feature roughly $1 trillion worth of spending cuts. But this is nice.

He's leaving in a few extra bucks to buy some clothes for Kanye's wife.

Please don't. The U.S. Navy has unveiled a photo of a warship firing a high-powered laser weapon. Its first target, removing

Rashida Taleb's mustache. In Iran, a naked woman jumped on a police car to protest the country's treatment of women.

In a related story, guess who just moved to Iran?

...