Managing Unhealthy Family Relationships (Nedra Tawwab)

Pulling The Thread with Elise Loehnen

Elise Loehnen

Society & Culture, Religion & Spirituality, Self-improvement, Education

4.8 • 900 Ratings

🗓️ 23 February 2023

⏱️ 48 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

“I think the biggest challenge with codependency is, when a family member is catered to when their unhealthy or toxic behavior is catered to, it makes the other people in the situation neglected. You know, if you have a sibling who's getting more care than you, or you know, more financial support, that feels a certain way to you. And often we take that out on not just the person doing it, but the other person involved too. So the codependency just, it doesn't impact one relationship, it impacts many. And it really doesn't set anyone up for success. The best way to help a person is sometimes not helping. You know, I think about, um, all of the help I didn't receive, but figured it out. Those were the biggest lessons versus someone rescuing me or doing the work for me, or me never having to figure out this thing because there is someone I can call.” So says Nedra Glover Tawwab, sought-after relationship expert, licensed therapist and New York Times best-selling author of Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself. Her new book, Drama Free: A Guide to Managing Unhealthy Family Relationships is sure to hit the list as well. In this latest book, Nedra puts her 15 years of experience to work to demystify the ways that our earliest relationships—those with our family of origin—can lead us astray, causing us to abandon ourselves to maintain connection. Like her first bestseller, Drama-Free is packed with insights that are broken up in such a way as to be instantly actionable. Ultimately, it tackles what dysfunctional families look and feel like—and how to break free. Nedra is responsible for mainstreaming a cultural understanding of “boundaries,” and she now tackles other ideas that we all need to address, like co-dependency and enmeshment. In today’s conversation, we cover a lot of ground, including parenting, re-parenting, and what it means to offer support without overstepping. MORE FROM NEDRA TAWWAB: Drama Free: A Guide to Managing Unhealthy Family Relationships Set Boundaries, Find Peace: A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself The Set Boundaries Workbook: Practical Exercises for Understanding Your Needs and Setting Healthy Limits Follow Nedra on Instagram and Twitter Sign up for Nedra’s Newsletter To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hi, it's Elise Luna and host to Pulling the Thread.
0:03.1	I'm thrilled to welcome today's guest back to the podcast.
0:06.3	It's the therapist, Nedra Tawab, bestselling author of Set Boundaries, Find Peace,
0:11.2	and the wonderful new guide, Drama Free, a guide to managing unhealthy family relationships.
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0:45.3	Visit 32red.com for full terms. Hi, it's Elise Lunan, host of Pulling the Thread. I'm an author, podcast host and parent who built a long career in media. I grew up in a state of perpetual curiosity, investigating the world and asking a lot of questions.
1:13.0	In this show, I chat with culture-defining leaders, thinkers, and experts about this rare
1:18.3	moment that we find ourselves in and how to think about our own lives and experiences within a larger
1:24.0	social and spiritual construct.
1:28.0	I think the biggest challenge with codependency is when a family member is catered to, when
1:35.5	their unhealthy or toxic behavior is catered to, it makes the other people in the situation
1:42.9	neglected. You know, if you have a sibling who's getting more care than you or, you know, more financial
1:49.0	support, that feels a certain way to you.
1:52.0	And often we take that out on not just the person doing it, but the other person involved too.
1:58.0	So the codependency just, it doesn't impact one relationship. It impacts many.
2:02.9	And it really doesn't set anyone up for success. The best way to help a person is sometimes not
	...

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