Managing the Emotional Drain of Work and Leadership with Dina Denham Smith

The Anxious Achiever

Morra Aarons-Mele

Business, Careers, Management, Health & Fitness, Mental Health

4.7 • 599 Ratings

🗓️ 28 April 2026

⏱️ 62 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

What if the difference between reacting and responding was just a few seconds? In this episode, I sit down with executive coach Dina Denham Smith to talk about what really happens when you get triggered at work and how to handle it. Dina breaks down a framework to help you understand what emotions actually are, how they show up in your body, and how to interrupt the automatic reaction cycle. Tune in to learn how to pause in the moment, regulate your nervous system, and respond with clarity instead of stress, anxiety, or overwhelm. Check out our sponsors: Shopify - Sign up for a $1 per month trial, just go to shopify.com/anxiousachiever Chime - Head to chime.com/achiever to sign up Monarch - Use code ACHIEVER at monarch.com to get 50% off your first year In this Episode, You Will Learn 00:00 Why mastering your emotional reactions is the ultimate leadership skill. 03:45 The cost of masking emotions on your performance and energy. 06:30 The 3 parts of every emotion and why this changes how you manage them. 10:45 How to reframe stress into something useful. 13:30 Why do emotions feel unsafe for some people? 18:45 What’s the impact of emotions on team performance? 22:00 What to do when someone gets emotional in a meeting. 23:45 The grounding technique every leader should know. 28:15 The “Notice, Name, Need” framework for emotional regulation. 33:00 A breathing technique to calm your nervous system fast. 39:00 What’s the difference between coaching and therapy? 48:15 Why is leadership today emotionally exhausting? 54:00 How to disconnect from work and reset your brain. Resources + Links Get a copy of my book - The Anxious Achiever Watch the podcast on YouTube Find more resources on our website morraam.com Follow Follow me: on LinkedIn @morraaronsmele + Instagram @morraam Follow Dina on LinkedIn @dinadenhamsmith

Transcript

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0:00.0	What if you got to a point where you could feel a really big uncomfortable emotion or get triggered in a really big way?
0:13.6	And just let it go.
0:18.8	You can, you can. And today on The Anxious Achiever, I talk with Dina Denham Smith.
0:27.9	Dina is a renowned executive coach, leadership expert. She's one of the most popular authors
0:34.7	in the Harbor Business Review. She's a Thinkers 50 radar member,
0:39.2	and she's an expert on emotions at work. This episode is a little bit like a coaching
0:48.0	masterclass, and for that reason, I think you're going to love it if you listen to this show.
1:03.0	One of the things that Dina and I really dive into is how we manage our own triggered emotions. You know, the biggest thing in my life, the biggest thing in my life, the thing that has made the single biggest change in my life for the better is the ability to pause, to get triggered, to feel an emotion for me, it's usually anxiety,
1:19.9	and notice it, name it, understand it, and decide what to do with it.
1:30.1	That has been more than anything else, all the many kinds of therapies I've tried and
1:35.8	modalities and meds, all of which have been very important, it's that ability to feel
1:43.1	and pause and not be trapped by an emotion.
1:49.0	That's freedom. That's what I want for all of you.
1:53.0	So today, Jean and Denham Smith and I get into it with her decades-long expertise helping the world's most powerful leaders feel
2:04.4	their feelings and gain freedom from feeling stuck by them and instead use them for better.
2:16.2	Enjoy. Why is it important that we talk about emotions at work?
2:23.3	Because, and you've had a week two, I know. So let me ask you that question. Why is it important
2:30.4	that we talk about emotions at work? Well, it starts with the fact that anywhere you have
2:37.1	humans, you're going to have emotions. They are part of the most ancient, you know, parts of our
2:44.0	brain. And what is happening in workplaces in general is that emotional expression is stunted. But those emotions, they
2:54.5	don't go away. They just go underground. And there are all sorts of unwritten workplace rules
3:03.4	about what's okay to show, what's not okay to show, by whom, in what doses.
	...

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