Hello kids, this is Risk.

The show where people tell true stories they never thought they'd dare to share.

I'm Kevin Allyson and every Thursday we release these special episodes that we're calling

classic Risk Singles.

Each of these episodes features just one story from our earlier years.

If you're new to Risk you should know that the podcast can be very uncensored.

This week a story by the hilarious Sina John that he first shared on the podcast in September

of 2010.

It was edited by Jeff Mersell and it's called Malted Milk Balls.

A few years ago I was working on a production and I got really excited because Tom

Arnold was going to be on set.

Now I was a really big Tom Arnold fan before he showed up for work.

I soon realized that the man is a complete monster.

You can imagine how a kid feels.

I'm young, I'm coming up into stand up.

I really want to find a mentor, someone who's going to really guide me, give me some great

advice.

Then this guy comes up and he's got a prescription for a kilo of vikin from his doctor.

He's quote sober but really is that that's not really sober is it?

He's calling the director a queer in front of his family.

He's asking the executive producer for Diet Coke's.

He thinks the co-star that's next to him is his limo driver and then to top it all off

...