Mall Santa

The Truth

Film, Public, Mitchell, Prx, Fiction, Drama, Radio, Storytelling, Audio, Radiotopia, Story, Jonathan

4.7 • 3.8K Ratings

🗓️ 20 December 2022

⏱️ 22 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

🧾️ Download transcript

Summary

A disenchanted mall Santa gets a surprise gift from SantaCon.

This story was originally released in 2017. It was written by Louis Kornfeld, and performed by Tom Ligon, Chris Dwane, Anna Neu, Bianca Casusol, Jimmy O’Connell, Kevin Cobbs, Louis Kornfeld, Kerry Kastin, and Becca Schall.

Casper Kelly’s Adult Swim Yule Log: https://www.adultswim.com/videos/specials/adult-swim-yule-log

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Transcript

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0:00.0	This episode of The Truth includes strong language.
0:08.0	Hello, Facebook! This is Blinky the Elf, all the way from the North Pole, where I've scored an exclusive interview with the big man himself. That's right!
0:16.0	The one and only Santa Claus! Say hi, Santa!
0:19.0	What is this? What's going on?
0:20.0	Oh, I'm doing Facebook Live.
0:21.0	What does that mean?
0:22.0	Well, it means that all my friends can see you, so say hi!
0:26.0	Hi.
0:27.0	Ah, not Santa, I know that you're very busy. You're making all the presents for the boys and the girls, but if we could just take a couple minutes of your time, pick your brain a little bit.
0:36.0	Okay, fine.
0:37.0	Yay! Okay, okay. So, here's question number one.
0:40.0	How exactly do you get to all the houses in just one night?
0:43.0	How?
0:45.0	Magic.
0:47.0	Okay, magic! You heard it here.
0:49.0	Another question, because you're so thoughtful, you know, with everyone else, but we want to know what's the best present that you've ever gotten for Christmas.
0:57.0	Uh, I don't know.
0:59.0	Could be all the smiles of the boys and the girls?
1:02.0	Oh, yeah, yeah, okay.
1:03.0	Great answer, Santa! Now, I know a lot of people want to see you. How do people get to meet you in person?
1:09.0	Well, there's really no need, is there? You can buy anything you want online and have it delivered anywhere you want by drone.
1:17.0	And you don't even have to see anybody any more face to face.
	...

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