My mission is simple, to make you money.

I'm here to level the playing field for all investors.

There's always a homework somewhere,

and I promise to help you find it.

Man money starts now.

Hey, I'm Kramer.

Welcome to Mad Money.

Welcome to Cray America.

I'll be going to make friends.

I'm just trying to save you a money. My job is not just to entertain

but to really put it in context because days like today need that. So call me

1,807, 43CMBC or 3rd, or Tweeny, Jim, Kramer.

Look, this market's so ridiculous.

You can knock it over with a feather or take it up with a breeze.

I wanted to borrow from Charles Stegins.

It was the best of times.

It was the worst of times.

But the simple fact is that this isn't the worst of times, just the worst of times

for the stocks in certain industries and the best of times for others.

All within the combines is some hideous action for the average without sinking

six hundred twenty six points as to be punching two point one two percent

and an Aztec pummeling

...