My mission is simple, to make you money.

I'm here to level the playing field for all investors.

There's always a homework somewhere,

and I promise to help you find it.

Mad money starts now.

Hey, I'm Kramer.

Welcome to Mad Money.

Welcome to Cray America.

I'm going to make friends.

I'm just trying to make you some money.

My job is not just entertaining but to educate and teach you.

So call me at 1,807,000,000,000,000,000,000 people.

Whenever you're listening to anyone's investing advice, you need to consider the source.

And ideally you want to know where that person's coming from.

That's why tonight I'm going to tell you exactly who I am and how I got here.

No, not the standard introduction. I'm Jim Kramer, host, and I got here. No, not the standard introduction.

I'm Jim Kramer, host, the money, co-less, the Squawk of the Cee,

Museum Investing Club.

What I want to do tonight in an extremely special show by even by wacky standards is trace the arc that brought me to mad money.

Not for some autobiographical ego trip, but to give you some money-making lessons from the phases

of my various careers.

And explain, of course, how you can pop the phone.

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