Welcome to Kelly Corrigan Wonders. I'm Kelly Corrigan, and today I'm wondering about relationships, love, romance, sex, and how intellectual humility might make all those things much better.

Whether it's a first date with someone you just met on the internet, or a

25-year debate with a spouse you've been with since college, I'm wondering how can we show up

in a more open, flexible, and humble way. My guest is a biological anthropologist named Dr. Helen Fisher.

She's written six books on the evolution of sex, love, marriage, gender differences,

and how personality styles shape who we are and who we love.

So join us as we learn more about what I would say is the central emotion of a human life, love.

We'll be right back with Kelly Corrigan Wonders.

Welcome back to Kelly Corrigan Wonders. I'm Kelly Corrigan, and my guest today is Dr. Helen Fisher.

She's my new favorite person. She's a biological anthropologist. She is at the Kinsey Institute as a senior research fellow, and she's the chief science advisor to Match.com. She also created a personality quiz, which we'll link to in the show notes, to help people better understand themselves and their partners.

It's been taken by over 14 million people in 40 countries.

So the data set is enormous.

Here is my conversation with the candid, informed, and delightful Dr. Helen Fisher.

Helen Fisher, you are the first biological anthropologist I've ever talked to in my life.

So beware, because now that I've found you, I feel like I'm going to be texting you constantly

with little questions about my own relationships. But can we start by sort of defining

two groups of people from your point of view and your research? One is the New Victorians and

two are people in long-term relationships. So what are the New Victorians and what is slow love?

Well, the New Victorians are the young. They're far less sexual. You know, every part of the life cycle is expanding. I mean, childhood is expanding. Youth is expanding, middle age is expanding and older age is expanding. And so they're slow on the start. They're very serious. I'm crazy about the new. I mean, I call them the new Victorians because they're less sexual, they're extremely interested in

career. They're very earnest lots of young art today. I'm very impressed with them. And they are taking

care to do it right. You know, they've seen so much turmoil and so much chaos around them. And what

they're doing is what I call slow love. And I get this data because, you know, I'm chief science advisor to the dating

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