Hi, listeners. I have a story I want to tell you.

There was this doctor over at St. Agrees who would kill his patients.

Oh yes, it was madness.

Aren't you afraid the light take might get you?

I'm sorry, I didn't listen to you.

That adrenaline.

I want more of it.

I snapped.

Totally lost it.

He had no idea what was on those tapes.

It was like a song. It's Ollie and the Outcast.

So gather around.

And listen.

Close. I used to work at a university.

No, I wasn't a brilliant, beloved professor on track for tenure.

I was a lowly staff worker, running small programs and events for graduate

students. Now, before you get the wrong idea, you should know I loved my job. Well, liked it,

anyway. The pay was steady, my supervisor was supportive. I had fantastic benefits and got pretty much every holiday paid off, even National Arbor Day.

The only problem was the parking.

Even though I was a full-time employee, the university made its staff pay for parking. I thought it was

shifty, but, hey, I wasn't the one making the rules. Naturally, my stubborn mule sought to avoid

the $7 parking fee, so I studied for some exemption, a workaround, if you will.

...