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I'm Gretchen Rubin and this is a little happier.

I am a big fan of the writing of Carl Uva Canal Squirt.

In book six of his massive, multi-volume autobiographical novels, My Struggle,

he writes about his relationship with his brother, Gire.

He writes,

When we moved to Malmo, I had been afraid Gire and I would lose touch.

That's what distance does. When the time between conversations gets longer,

intimacy diminishes. The little things connected to one's daily life lose their place.

It seems odd to talk about a shirt you just bought, or to mention you're thinking of leaving the dishes

until morning, when you haven't spoken to a person for two weeks or a month.

That absence would seem instead to call for more important topics.

And once they begin to determine the conversation, there's no turning back.

Because then it's two diplomats exchanging information about their respective realms and a conversation

that needs to be started up from scratch, in a sense every time, which gradually becomes tedious.

...