As a father,

father sometimes my children come to me and they want to talk about something

difficult or they have a request and as they share

instead of trying to solve the problem which which is my inclination, I've learned to try to listen.

Now this just happened the other day when one of my kids had something they wanted to see happen,

and I was kind of problem shooting and trying to offer reasons why

this or that wouldn't work but I stopped myself and I said well why do you think

that is what do you think would be the best course?

And that's something we all have to learn how to do.

I'm John Feller along with Dr. Danny Werta.

He leads our parenting department here.

And we're going to hear now from Crystal Payne who talks about

parenting and four important choices you can make as a parent with your children

on a previous episode she shared the first one of those four which was

lean in and love. Okay so we lean in and love that's one of the four choices

we as parents make the next is to listen well. I love this one because I'm

terrible at it. I'm usually talking over my kids so how do we stop and truly

listen well? So we come with this attitude of I care about you and I want to lean in and just express

love to you and then stop and ask them questions. So often when something has happened I will jump to

conclusions or project my own beliefs on what has happened whether you get an

email from school or a call from school or a

friend tells you something your child did or another child tells you something your child did

...