Listener Mail: Raccoon Penis Toothpicks, FNU LNU, Rigid Airships
Stuff They Don't Want You To Know
iHeartPodcasts
4.2 • 11K Ratings
🗓️ 17 April 2026
⏱️ 38 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
In this week's listener mail segment: Xevious Wrecks hips Ben and Noel to 'hillbilly toothpicks', a euphemism for raccoon penises, inspiring the guys to never see the internet again. Uncle Bosco explores how you can hack encounters with police by using the alias 'FNU LNU' (spoiler, you get in situations). Jameson reveals a conspiracy afoot with the world's standing record for IQ tests. Sergeant Will proposes that at least a few UFOs are obscure, spooky rigid airships. In our Letters From Home, Trogoldyte shares a phenomenal real-life encounter with rutabagas.
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | From UFOs to psychic powers and government conspiracies, history is riddled with unexplained events. |
| 0:06.5 | You can turn back now or learn the stuff they don't want you to know. |
| 0:12.0 | A production of IHeart Radio. Hello and welcome back to the show. |
| 0:27.7 | My name is Noel. |
| 0:29.0 | And our colleague Matt is on an adventure. |
| 0:31.5 | We'll be returning soon. |
| 0:32.9 | They called me Ben. |
| 0:34.1 | We're joined as always with our super producer, Dylan, the Tennessee pal Fagan. |
| 0:38.4 | Most importantly, you are you, you are here. That makes this the stuff they don't want you to know. |
| 0:44.2 | If you are tuning in to our listener mail program, the evening it publishes, welcome to April 16th, |
| 0:50.5 | 2026. And, Noel, we've got a bunch of rapid fire crazy ones today. I was thinking, |
| 0:59.0 | if you're okay with it, we start with something kind of gross. |
| 1:03.4 | Oh, love it. Let's rip the Band-Aid off and pick the scab. |
| 1:06.4 | Yeah, sorry. I'm really sorry. I had to get out. |
| 1:09.2 | Well, let's pick our teeth. How about this? Tell us what you think afterwards. |
| 1:14.9 | Folks, we couldn't think of a better way to open the show than with a word from our good pal, |
| 1:21.4 | Xievous Rex, who introduces us to a fact we never wanted to learn about raccoons. Here it goes. Greetings, Ben, Matt, |
| 1:30.5 | Noel, and Dylan. First, use this as you wish. You may call me Zevious Rex. That's Zevious with an |
| 1:37.2 | X and Rex like a car wreck. Just listened to your story mentioning RFK Jr'ss Roadkill Forging Tale or Tails, |
| 1:46.5 | I had a brain blast, shout out Jimmy Neutron, |
| 1:50.1 | and recalled a memory from ways back in my 60 years. |
| 1:55.0 | All right, here we go, folks. |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from iHeartPodcasts, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of iHeartPodcasts and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.