Limerence Deep Dive (Chapter 4 - Intrusive Fantasies and Distorted Signals)
Psychology In Seattle Podcast
Kirk Honda
4.6 • 1.2K Ratings
🗓️ 1 December 2025
⏱️ 29 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/KIRK to get 10% off your first month.
00:00 Intro
01:45 intrusive thoughts
23:12 Daydreaming & fantasy
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Transcript
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| 0:00.0 | Hey, Deservant Listeners, this is Chapter 4 in my deep dive on limerence. In Chapter 3, I went into detail about the signs. |
| 0:08.3 | I briefly described the signs of limerence. I also went into full detail, delineating between |
| 0:15.8 | what I would like to call pathological limerence and normal infatuation or having a crush. |
| 0:22.8 | And I hope that I, especially in the patron zone, convinced y'all that limerance is not |
| 0:28.9 | just a normal, healthy, typical experience of falling in love or liking someone or being infatuated |
| 0:36.6 | with someone. It is entirely different from that and it has all the hallmarks of any other disorder in the DSM, |
| 0:42.1 | the clinically significant distress, the impairment on life, that kind of thing and it can last for years. |
| 0:49.4 | So I thought in this episode I would start talking about the symptoms in detail. |
| 0:57.0 | And I will introduce myself. |
| 0:59.4 | My name is Dr. Kirkana. |
| 1:00.6 | I'm a therapist and a professor. |
| 1:02.2 | And this is the Psychology in Seattle YouTube and podcast, YouTube channel and podcast. |
| 1:07.8 | I've been doing this for 17 years if you're new to the podcast or YouTube channel. |
| 1:12.8 | And as is typical with mental disorders, we will categorize the symptoms into four broad |
| 1:20.3 | categories, which I will do here. We have cognitive symptoms. We have emotional symptoms of |
| 1:27.4 | limerence. We have behavioral symptoms of limerence. We have behavioral symptoms of |
| 1:29.9 | limerence and we have somatic or physical symptoms of limerence. So we're going to talk about |
| 1:35.6 | cognitive symptoms first. There are a number of categories of cognitive symptoms. The first |
| 1:42.6 | symptom that I want to highlight is the intrusive thoughts. |
| 1:47.1 | This is the hallmark of limerence. So this is the constant uncontrollable preoccupation with the |
| 1:57.4 | limerent object. So these are thoughts that enter the mind involuntarily for the most part, |
| 2:03.5 | and they're constant, they're uncontrollable, they're frequent, and they're unwanted typically. |
... |
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