This is Bird Note. I'm Jay Drew Lanham, an ornithologist, naturalist, and writer, and this is a note I've written to a bird I love.

Dear pilliated woodpecker, first off, do you prefer a long eye or short? Just want to make sure I start off right. Personally, I go for

the pilliated pronunciation and not the pileated one. Potato, potato, right? Speaking of names,

been wondering what you think of all the Lord God bird stuff, people mistaking you for the long-lost ivory bill woodpecker.

I mean, after all, that huge ivory bill used to give you guys a run for your biggest pecker

money back in the day.

Yeah, I know.

The difference is obvious.

But trust me, I know what it's like for someone to see big and black and fall to assumption.

Exhausting, ain't it?

Anyway, just wanted you to know I appreciate all that mistaken identity nonsense you put up with,

and it's pretty awesome the way your calls make even the suburban

wood lots seem like faraway wildness. I really don't like the whole hen of the woods name some

folks gave you way back when, but I'll let you choose the best name for you.

Hoping the hammering headaches aren't too bad and the profiling doesn't cost you your own

identity.

All best, Drew.