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Ladies and gentlemen, if you don't know yet, you do now or in about a minute.

The felon in chief spent five minutes of Thursday's cabinet meeting boasting of his thrift with a story about negotiating for $5 personalized

Sharpies. The Washington Post reports. The company that makes the permanent marker said the exchange

never happened. Trump was busy touting his plans to make over the, what used to be the Kennedy Center

and criticizing the renovation of the Federal Reserve headquarters. You've heard him do that, right,

about 4,000 times. Then he went off on a tangent about the pen he was holding. Quote,

this pen is an interesting example, he said, of the black permanent marker. This pen is very inexpensive, but it writes

well, I like it. He claimed that he'd gotten a deal on White House Sharpies. His preference for

Sharpies is as well known as his tendency to, you know, loosen up with the truth.

He said he asked the marker maker

for a solution to make the pens look more official.

I called the guy.

I said, I'd like to use your pen,

but I can't have a great thing with the big ass on it,

saying Sharpie as I'm signing a $1 trillion airplane contract

to buy brand new fighter jets,

he said. Then back to Trump.

He says, well, I can make it nicer. I said, what can you do? He said, I can paint it black.

I said, that's nice. And he said, I can even paint the White House on it, sir, if you like in gold,

almost real gold, not bad. And I can even do your signature, sir. Trump continued.

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