Here it is.

From deep inside your audio device of choice.

Ladies and gentlemen, enough depressing stuff in the news these days.

Little relief from that, Dateline Newark, New Jersey,

a Pennsylvania man who was going through security at a New Jersey airport, was found to have

had a live turtle concealed in his pants, according to the Transportation Security Administration.

They won't be doing that for long.

The turtle was detected after a body scanner alarm went off at

Newark Liberty International Airport, a TSA officer then conducted a pat-down on the man from East

Stroudsburg, I guess that's in New Jersey, a man, and determined there was something

concealed in his, well, in the groin area of his pants when questioned further the man reached into said pants and pulled out the turtle which was about five inches long wrapped in a small blue towel

turtles like towels don't they?

He said it was a red ear slider turtle,

a species that's popular as a pet.

The man named not released was escorted from the checkpoint area

by Port Authority Police ended up missing his flight.

The turtle was confiscated, not clear.

If the turtle was the man's pet or why he had it in his pants.

Well, wouldn't fit in a shirt.

The TSA Federal Security Director for New Jersey said the incident remains under investigation,

not clear if the man would face any charges or penalties.

Well, they took away his turtle.

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