My guest today, Lance Allred, was born legally deaf in a polygamous commune in rural Montana.

When he was about 13, his family escaped and eventually came out of hiding in Utah,

where for the first time in his life, he had to figure out how to step back into a world

that he had no experience understanding, let alone navigating.

Lance had always loved writing, but at nearly six foot four in middle school and looking

for a new way to kind of fit in to belong, his height caught the eye of the basketball

coach and the game quickly became his life.

He would have to learn how not just to play basketball and really figure out the rules

of a society that he had not lived in until then, but also how to immerse himself in

this game that became the center of his life and communicate with his teammates without

being able to hear them.

Becoming a star athlete eventually, it led Lance to college, then years playing all over

the world in the pros, including a stint in the NBA.

But underneath it all, Lance never left his love of writing and profound self inquiry

behind.

We got to share his inner life in print, authoring a number of books eventually leaving basketball

to speak and train leaders in his newest book, The New Alpha Mail.

Lance turns a deeply reflective and insightful and honest lens on the role of masculinity

in his own life, how his experience of it has changed dramatically since becoming a dad,

effectively moving through a breakdown in his own life.

And what he is sort of here to do and how he describes the role of being in his mail

slash masculine body and psyche now.

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