Very soon, I get to do my favorite thing. Go on tour and meet so many of you.

This month, Criminal is coming to Austin, Tucson, Boulder, Portland, Oregon, Detroit, Madison, Northampton, and Atlanta.

If you didn't get to come and see our 10-year anniversary show earlier this year, this is your last chance.

You'll get to hear seven brand new stories, most of which will

probably make you laugh. I'll even try to come and say hi at the merch table. Get your tickets

while they last at this iscriminal.com slash live.

Seven. A Christmas Tragedy.

It was a fairly merry Christmas party, although the surliness of our host somewhat marred the festivities.

But imagine two such beautiful young women as my own dear lady, and Margaret Seeley,

and a Christmas Eve Cinderella in the beautiful ballroom at Cleaver Hall, and you will understand

that even Major Seeley's well-known cantankerous temper could not altogether spoil the merriment

of a good old-fashioned festive gathering. It is a far cry from a Christmas Eve party to a series

of cattle-maming outrages, yet I am forced to mention these now, for

although they were ultimately proved to have no connection with the murder of the unfortunate

major, yet they were undoubtedly the means whereby the miscreant was enabled to accomplish

the horrible deed with surety, swiftness, and, as it turned out afterwards, a very grave chance

of immunity.

Everyone in the neighborhood had been taking the keenest possible interest in those dastardly

outrages against innocent animals.

They were either the work of desperate ruffians who stick at nothing in order to obtain a few shillings,

or else of madmen with weird propensities for purposeless crimes.

Once or twice, suspicious characters had been seen lurking about in the fields,

...