Labour Meltdown, Out‑of‑Touch Madness & Wes Streeting Admitted What?!
The Trawl
Jemma Forte & Marina Purkiss
4.7 • 867 Ratings
🗓️ 12 February 2026
⏱️ 39 minutes
🧾️ Download transcript
Summary
This week, we start with cursed Valentine’s poetry from...Greg Wallace and a rogue “dangler", before plunging straight into the political sewer. Rory Stewart decides that £94k counts as “low income”, Trump posts a racist video in the middle of the night and then immediately blows up his own press office’s cover story, and Labour descends into full‑blown chaos as Morgan McSweeney finally exits stage left.
Marina and Jemma pick through the wreckage: Wes Streeting’s leaked war‑crimes admission, Mandelson’s potential fingerprints over Palantir, and a Labour Party so busy chasing Reform voters it’s forgotten its own base. It’s maddening, it’s bleakly funny, and it’s exactly why The Trawl exists - because someone has to sift through this BS.
Thank you for sharing and please do follow us @MarinaPurkiss @jemmaforte @TheTrawlPodcast
Patreon
https://patreon.com/TheTrawlPodcast
Youtube
https://www.youtube.com/@TheTrawl
https://twitter.com/TheTrawlPodcast
If you’ve even mildly enjoyed The Trawl, you’ll love the unfiltered, no-holds-barred extras from Jemma & Marina over on Patreon, including:
• Exclusive episodes of The Trawl Goss – where Jemma and Marina spill backstage gossip, dive into their personal lives, and often forget the mic is on
• Early access to The Trawl Meets…
• Glorious ad-free episodes
Plus, there’s a bell-free community of over 3,300 legends sparking brilliant chat.
And it’s your way to support the pod which the ladies pour their hearts, souls (and occasional anxiety) into. All for your listening pleasure and reassurance that through this geopolitical s**tstorm… you’re not alone.
Come join the fun:
https://www.patreon.com/TheTrawlPodcast?utm_campaign=creatorshare_creator
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Transcript
Click on a timestamp to play from that location
| 0:00.0 | Hundreds of MPs on low incomes, some of them very insecure, struggling to get jobs when they leave. |
| 0:07.0 | They are perfect prey for wealthy, well-connected men who can offer them board positions and by their parties. Hello and welcome to The Trall where we pooper scoop for news droppings and present |
| 0:30.0 | to you in the Tupperware that is this podcast. I'm Marina Perkins and I'm Gemma Forte. What introduction |
| 0:37.3 | is that? Like 328 or something. Yeah. And I'm Gemma Forte. What introduction is that? |
| 0:37.8 | Like 328 or something. |
| 0:39.7 | Yeah. |
| 0:40.3 | And look, as if the world isn't barmy enough trawlers, some people, some people are going to be getting the weirdest valentines ever. |
| 0:50.1 | Here's ex-master, Greg Wallace. |
| 0:53.6 | And this was posted by Made in Poor Taste. |
| 0:56.3 | Would you like me to send somebody a Valentine's message for you? |
| 0:59.6 | It can be romantic, heartfelt, it can be cheeky, it can be funny if you want. |
| 1:06.4 | You can find me on cameo. |
| 1:08.3 | Oh, there you go. |
| 1:09.8 | A Valentine's for somebody you don't love anymore. Brutal. Absolutely. Brutal. What would you do? Have you got that from Ben? Oh, do you know what? Don't put ideas in his head. I'll be happy, Ben. I've got a low bar, just a dining, sort of one of those dining deals. |
| 1:27.9 | That's fine. I'm all right. Nirty night. She's low maintenance. You know what I mean? |
| 1:34.8 | Ashley Meredith Music said, |
| 1:36.5 | Roses are red. His jeans are by Wrangler. He undoes the fly and flops out his dangleer. Happy Valentine's. |
| 1:42.2 | Richie S-A-X said, roses are red. I lost my job when I accidentally |
| 1:46.1 | whipped out my knob. And the, no, come on, they're good, they're good. I know. I didn't realize |
| 1:51.3 | that they were Greg Wallace themed. I thought they were just, yes, Valentine's Day themed tweets, |
| 1:56.2 | but no, Greg Wallace. No, they are pertinent to him. And Amanda Abington, the actress said, |
| 2:01.7 | is it weird that you would intentionally ask and then pay Greg Wallace to send your partner |
... |
Please login to see the full transcript.
Disclaimer: The podcast and artwork embedded on this page are from Jemma Forte & Marina Purkiss, and are the property of its owner and not affiliated with or endorsed by Tapesearch.
Generated transcripts are the property of Jemma Forte & Marina Purkiss and are distributed freely under the Fair Use doctrine. Transcripts generated by Tapesearch are not guaranteed to be accurate.
Copyright © Tapesearch 2026.