KISS Sucks

Your Favorite Band Sucks

Music

3.7 • 2.6K Ratings

🗓️ 8 February 2018

⏱️ 32 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

All these songs sound like a 13 year old boy talking about what he thinks sex would be like and half the merch is marketed at 10 year olds. Who let this happen? Also, is KISS even a band? Because none of them can write, sing or play an instrument. Oh, yeah, we know your parents let you listen to this when you were a kid. But what we're saying is they did maybe-irreparable damage to you in doing so and it's possible that every failed relationship in your life could be this band's fault. Also, no, this is not genius marketing but good try at skirting the main issue, which is that KISS sucks!

Transcript

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0:00.0	Kacing is so stupid.
0:11.2	In what way?
0:12.3	It's gross, don't get me wrong, but in what ways it's stupid.
0:14.8	Okay, what are we in ninth grade and you're gonna dry hump me until my dick gets raw and
0:19.4	we're not gonna fuck.
0:20.4	Kacing is first base.
0:21.4	And it is gross, it really is gross.
0:23.0	It is gross.
0:24.0	It kind of makes sense from an evolutionary standpoint.
0:25.6	If what it is is there are certain people that you need to be around and you need to have
0:30.1	all their gross shit in your system to get your immune system built up.
0:34.4	And so that's why you touch faces every now and then.
0:36.4	Right, it's like a guaranteed way of just spreading disease in germs.
0:40.2	That's all it is.
0:41.2	There's nothing more to it.
0:42.2	Stop kissing.
0:43.2	Quick story is my wife loves the bachelor.
0:45.8	Oh, I end, yeah.
0:46.8	Oh, he's right.
0:47.8	And I love my wife, so I watch it with her every now and then.
0:50.0	They show that dork and he is a dork every single time.
0:53.8	They always show him kissing at least one of them every episode.
	...

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