Hello, listener. My name is Jason. I will be one of three hosts. I'm a non-time host.

You're going to have a couple of tardy hosts joining us soon. If not, you're just going to get me.

Just a solo episode with me. I hope that's not your future. But until then, let me tell you a

little bit about myself. I'm a Capricorn, a Saj moon. I love things sweetened with anything other

than sugar. I've had addiction issues. I've got to handle on that. I think, unless you put

something sweetened with sugar in front of me, it's a real trigger situation for me. I just go

right down a hillside full of sand. Oh, just in time. Here are the idiots. Guys, welcome to Smartless.

The listener does not know this, but this is our second episode today that we're recording.

So, what did you guys do in between shows? I had a little egg sandwich. I had pasta that

I made myself, not an egg salad sandwich like Sean would have made. You had an egg sandwich.

What was the bread? Was it actual bread? Not really. It was gluten-free bread that I had to

toast to within an inch of its life. So, it tasted decent. Then I put a little fake butter on it.

Then the eggs on top. I'm pretty sure the eggs were real. We had a conversation with our friend

on a different episode about enjoying ourselves and stuff. But I feel it. But I enjoy it. It tastes

great. I enjoy it. I enjoy, now, last night we went out for a family dinner to this

yummier restaurant down the street that specializes in Italian food. So, I ordered a nice big fat

cheese pizza. I went down more than probably I should have. We had some pasta.

And I had in B.A. in B.A. tour in the valley down in Laurel Canyon.

Oh, little patch. Yeah. Yeah. A little patch. Oh, you went, you went, you went,

patch, I'm not patch. No, I know. But I say, patch, you leave it off. That's how you know that

you're legit. You leave it all. This is what we do to patch. Hey, there's maybe and she can't hear us.

I was, I made that was made for you. She's over here. Are you guys going for dinner tonight

...