Do you ever walk in and find your husband quickly zipping up his pain?

Does your husband suffer from chapped dick?

Then he may be addicted to porn.

Mine was, and he left me to go be number 73 in the world's biggest gang bang.

Did you know that one out of three marriages are ruined by excessive porno?

Mine was, if you think your husband has a porno habit, help that nasty bastard before it goes too far.

The early warning signs are there. Ask him to do a self-exam.

If you watch porno before 10 a.m. If you know the name of any guy in

pornos besides Ron Jeremy, if you can't get aroused unless you hear this, you may be

addicted to porno. If you're willing to donate your spine to Larry Flint, if your woman has

thrown away all of your porn tapes and you masturbate to the view. Starjo.

If you like your woman to shower in five-inch pumps, if you think the only way to get your woman

pregnant is by shooting sperm in her eye, you might be addicted to porn.

Maybe I'm old-fashioned, but double anal penetration is just not my cup of tea.

Party pooper.

So if you think your husband is addicted to porno,

please call 1-800-I-see-your-ass today.

That's 1-800-I-see-your-ass.

Excuse me.

Call today.

Blunt.

Do you like to be blunt?

...