Joshua Cavallo: The Pressure of Being The Only Openly Gay Footballer And Why So Many Stay Silent

We Need To Talk with Paul C. Brunson

FlightStory

Relationships, Society & Culture, Leisure

4.7 • 1.2K Ratings

🗓️ 2 December 2025

⏱️ 101 minutes

🔗️ Recording | iTunes | RSS

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Summary

Professional footballer Joshua Cavallo opens up about coming out as the world’s only openly gay active male footballer - and the reality he faced once the headlines faded. From his coach’s immediate response to the fear he’d lose the career he’d worked his whole life for, Josh reveals why so many gay players still feel unable to speak their truth. Josh reflects on the years he spent living a double life, the isolation that defined his teens, and the moment he finally chose honesty over fear. He also shares the global ripple effect of his coming-out video, the abuse he’s endured in stadiums and online, and how falling in love with fiancé Leighton changed everything. Josh reveals: ◽ Why he believes LGBTQ+ rights are moving backwards ◽ The family expectations he grew up with and why he felt he could never truly be himself ◽ The double life he lived as a teenager and the mental toll of hiding who he was ◽ The coming out letter he wrote to his family ◽ The conversation with his coaches that changed everything ◽ Why so many gay footballers still stay silent ◽ The homophobia he still faces every day ◽ How he secretly mentors closeted professional players ◽ How he proposed to his partner Leighton Josh Cavallo. We Need To Talk Follow me here: https://www.instagram.com/needtotalk https://www.tiktok.com/@weneedtotalkpod (00:00) Intro (03:35) How Josh's Maltese Heritage Shaped His Upbringing (06:11) Paul Shows Josh a Childhood Photo (07:57) What Josh Learned About Love From His Grandfather (09:48) When Josh First Realised He Was Gay (11:27) Josh on Developing and Maintaining a ‘Mask’ (14:22) Support Josh Had Starting Out in the Football Industry (18:26) Leaving Dating Apps and Meeting His Fiancée (23:33) How Josh Came Out To His Family (33:03) How Josh Came Out to His Teammates (37:20) Public Reaction to Josh Coming Out (40:20) How Josh Realised He Wanted to Be an Advocate (42:43) Did the League Embrace Josh’s News? (43:44) Surprise Video Message For Josh (46:20) Statistics Around Homophobia in Football (48:05) Josh’s View on Homophobia in Today’s Football (49:09) Why Josh Thinks the Problem Is Getting Worse (51:23) Why Other Athletes Aren’t Coming Out (52:18) Josh’s Experience of a Homophobic Attack (54:52) Being on the Cover of Attitude Magazine (56:26) Too Good To Go Ad (57:42) Differences Playing Football in Australia vs the UK (59:51) Times Josh Felt Unsafe on the Pitch (01:05:21) Mentoring Closeted Footballers (01:09:16) The Story of Josh's Proposal to His Fiancée (01:13:35) Video Message From Fiancée Leighton (01:16:26) Josh and Leighton on Having Children (01:19:12) Adobe Express Ad (01:20:19) Huel Ad (01:21:45) How to Stop the Backslide in Civil Rights (01:29:40) The Hypocrisy of the Qatar World Cup (01:34:44) Josh’s Message to the Queer Community (01:35:31) Most Memorable Conversation (01:38:29) Paul’s Takeaways Sponsored by: Sponsored by: Too Good To Go: Download the Too Good To Go App to get started Adobe Express: https://ADOBE.LY/ONEBETTER Huel: https://uk.huel.com/WNTT with code WNTT Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript

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0:00.0	Hey Harry.
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1:00.2	You would be the first openly gay player of a top flight team.
1:05.7	The world was silent.
1:06.6	That's when I saw, okay, that person that pat you on the back of coming out
1:09.8	didn't mean it because when it counts, they're not there. I never knew little Joshi could even play football and be gay. It turned to a point where I won Best Young Player of that season and having to act and hide from these people and I'm getting such a privileged award. It killed me. We had a huddle in the change room and I announced who I was.
	...

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